Dancing Lessons

I was watching the girls in their ballet class a few nights ago, and joking with a good friend that wouldn't it be fun for the Mums to do a class. Wouldn't it just - even though it may be more baggy t-shirts and legwarmers than tights and leotards these days. When my credit card was cloned recently, I think I wouldn't have minded so much if they had used it for interesting things like tap classes (as happened to Monica in Friends), rather than electrical goods. Dancing is one of those things I love - and apart from hoofing it round the kitchen with the children just don't do anymore. Ironically the six year old is taking some persuading to do the class - but learning the grace, agility and core strength that only ballet can give you is really important for someone who will probably be nearly 6ft tall, as I was before shrinking a few inches carrying the children.

It is amazing how quickly the children learn - you see them soaking up information. Having said that there are some things only learnt by repetition. Between the children and the wilful hound I seem to spend too much of my time repeating the same mantra: 'no ... say please ... say thank you ... please don't shout ... please don't chew the furniture/tip out the bin (hound) ...' Sometimes it feels like groundhog day in a school of etiquette around here.

Everything takes longer as you get older. A common complaint about initiatives like The Happiness Project is that it is rehashing old advice. Well, I think sometimes it takes hearing good advice several times before it 'clicks' and you are ready for it. Someone somewhere will always be reading it for the first time, and someone else will have heard it twenty times but only just be in the right place to take it on board. Just think of the promises emblazoned across the glossy women's magazines each month: 'Lose 7lbs in week!' (surprise! - restrict calories, avoid certain food groups and salt, move your backside). As for the perennial search for happiness and meaning in life, that's something only the individual can learn, and it has a lot more to do with giving back, and doing good for others with a conscious decision to see the good around you than any magical combination of material factors coming into alignment. I was thrilled to read the other day that schools in the south of England are starting to teach positive psychology to children - a glass half full outlook will bring greater success and happiness to an individual than any number of lessons about quadratic equations.

It's not easy - happiness is elusive, creeps up on you when you are least expecting it. It's not always found where you think it will be (I wonder sometimes when I finally see The Book on the shelves of Borders will I be dancing inside or have found something new to focus on - position, sales, the book next door having a more beautiful cover ...) This is why I'm aiming for contentment these days. My birthday resolution to lighten up has good days and bad days. Today was not going so well until I found this Fellini clip in my Favorites menu, and I felt like dancing again.

I grew up next door to one of Fellini's costume designers - she was a hard smoking, drinking vision of a woman with great style and beauty, and provided the inspiration for the mother in The Book. She taught a gauche teenager a great deal about life. When I studied Arts Management after uni, they made a great deal about finding a 'mentor'. At the time I volunteered for an arts festival, ferrying celebs and performers around the wilds of Norfolk. My 'mentor' though he would have shuddered elegantly at the tag, taught me more about the business of art than I learnt on the entire course (and he once tangoed with Hockney in a tutu so what can I say?) One of the greatest mentors I had was a woman who revolutionised the art market, bringing contemporary Arab art to the west before anyone else had thought of it - she did this with great spirit, and gave a lot back, enriching the lives of countless people. All these 'mentors' - and the many other amazing indiviuals I have been lucky to meet shaped me, my work, and taught me how to dance.

TODAY'S PROMPT: I was listening to the radio while unpacking the books in the basement, and they were interviewing a guy who had had an out of body experience when he died briefly. He said he was asked 'what have you learned?' and the moment he realised he still had a lot to figure out, he came back to his body. So - what have you learned? Who are the great mentors in your life? Is there a way you can give back some of the lessons you have learned? Are there things you still want to find out about? Personally, I'm going to start by looking into those dancing lessons ...