Lights Camera Action

When I told the three year old I was going to be on TV he frowned. 'But how do you get in there?' he asked. It's rather wonderful to think that to him these little people really live in the box - I didn't want to disillusion him by telling him about TV studios. When we watched my heat of the People's Author he looked puzzled - how could I be sitting on the sofa next to him, and be on TV?

Thank you so much to all of you who have emailed, Facebooked and Tweeted - yes, I lost, but as the pilot said with a chuckle 'that doesn't mean you're like, a loser'. Fnaa. He also said 'don't worry - you don't really look like that'. Reassuring. My Mum's first words were: 'Oooh, the cameras really do add 10lbs don't they? Your face isn't really that fat'. Good old family - keep your feet on the ground don't they? Perhaps the best thing to come out of this competition is that after all the ongoing agony of not getting my novel published, ('Any news yet?' 'No, still waiting ...' - how many times have I had that conversation recently), my writing finally makes sense to my family - if I met Alan Titchmarsh it must be OK. Taking part in the show gave the people I love most in the world something to look forward to, and I was touched by how proud they were. It was lovely hearing the excitement in the voice of my 92 year old grandmother, and funny to hear how many people had rung Mum and Dad to say they had seen the show (I think Mum had mobilised half the country in preparation for the audience phone-in final if I'd got through).

I think they were more disappointed than me ... but anyway, your lovely words of support and the comments from the judges meant a lot. Marian Keyes said: 'on a sentence by sentence basis you're like a poet. Your descriptions are absolutely exquisite', Gervase Phinn 'loved it', and Amanda Harris said 'it was one of the most lyrical submissions we had'. Which was nice :) For anyone who'd like to read my submission and all the others they are up on the ITV site here.

I am useless at losing ... I won't pretend I didn't really want to win, but as always you pick yourself up and start over again. Being on TV for the first time was a great experience - the team were delightful and Alan Titchmarsh is just as he seems on TV, down to earth and charming. It was a long day (up at 4am, home around 9pm), lots of hanging around (Gervase Phinn kept us entertained with endless anecdotes). You feel a bit like a gladiator, cooped up in a green room downstairs until you are dragged up to the studio, sprayed orange by the make-up girls and thrust out in front of the audience ... Then suddenly you are there. Your are *so* nervous, and your bit goes by so fast you can't remember a word of it. Then you wait for the judges verdict:
And wait. At this point the sparkly gold envelope is handed over to Alan, and I'm thinking: 'whatever you do smile. No cursing or scowling if it's not you. Smile.' The waiting seems endless, they play music to raise the tension ... the envelope is opened (and in spite of your gut feeling that they are looking for something - or someone - that isn't you, you are thinking 'Pleeeease let it be me') ...

... and then the man with the rocking horse wins.

7/11/09 PS a friend just let me know you can watch the episode again here: (at around 9 minutes in)

TODAY'S PROMPT: You win some, you lose some. So, (dusts self down), the partially written memoir has been consigned to the basement. It's filed alongside all the filmscripts and future novels I plan to write one day. It will be finished at some point but the new novel is more pressing at the moment. For anyone who missed out on entering the ITV competition, the BBC have launched a similar show - why not check out bbc.co.uk/mystory - and write the story of your life. The People's Author was a blast, and having a go at non-fiction memoir writing for the first time a great challenge. The BBC entries only have to be 300 - 1500 words, so why not have a go?